Deepavali

It's been 4 months since I ended this relationship. I can't remember the exact date I said it out, but should be there.. Things change and so is everyone.. Eng Yee's birthday is coming up and he's successfully proposed to Ying. Congratz so much to him and salute his perseverance and patient in dealing with his relationship..


Somehow my feeling for her just didn't change.. The love, the care and the thoughts are all there.. The only thing I can relieve on is that the addiction is not that strong anymore.. But every afternoon during lunch time it still strikes. When the office starts to quiet down, when I just had my meal and about to go for a nap.. Something is still missing.. I know very well that it's the luncheon text message which has been missing for the past four months.. A simple habit becomes a routine and an addiction without even realising it until I am not doing it any longer..

Now I have many places that I feel like going. Many things I feel like doing.. I want to go to Putrajaya at night for the night view, and also to lay down on the road. I feel like driving around Damansara, KLCC areas to enjoy the night scene. I feel like going to the Ajinomoto factory to see what effort was put in that caused so much OT last time.. But all these, I just feel like doing them with a special one, only some whom I love.. They all seem too far for now, so I will postpone them indefinitely..

I have a strong feeling that she's not happy lately.. Well guy's intuition is always wrong or it's just my mind playing with my feelings.. I am not in the place to judge what she does, but hopefully she realises that she has her family members behind her.. Mom and brother who care for her, and also aunt who acts like a base for her to return to if she gets into trouble. Of course, little Stitch as the cheerleader.. I just text her brother after MU got thrashed, and his house is almost completed, just that I won't get the chance to visit that house. Though I just stayed for a week there, it felt so warm with the presence of the family members and all the trivial experience gained watching people living their lives in a visitor's perspective. I felt home and peace.. That's why I quitted the Nu Skin business opportunity.

Now I am back to square one. I got little to no cash, no place call home, staying independent. But I have fostered stronger bonds with all those around me, friends and family. 4 months and still counting the days I think of her.. Hope that Vivi won't have to endure such a long journey like I do.. Success or not in mending the relationship with him, I will support her as always..